My ungrateful Human has given up my secure location by tipping off the fuzz. Not the orange fuzzball with four legs that seems to follow me everywhere and meows incessantly, but the Feds; the Five-O.

Like always, I watched both humans this morning, pretending to be asleep, yet consciously fearful of their lives. Today followed that routine, but with a slight twist.

Beepy thing goes off, Human gets into the water, I follow to the bathroom to keep watch over him (while Orange One watches the female). I keep watch over Human, you see, to ensure he doesn’t do anything stupid. You never know what the half-wit will do next. Today, the watering proved uneventful, and he stepped out and got prepared for his daily leaving. Human always leaves me…

However, just prior to his exit, he picked up the ringy thing and said aloud, “Yes, you can pick him up then, around 3. I’ll be at work, but my wife will be here.” I can deduce three facts from this cryptic message (I always make these notes on reconnaissance missions):

1. “Work” translates to the place where human goes when he leaves me (note to me: find out more about this “work” place).

2. A pickup will take place here, in my domain at precisely 3 o’clock. But what day was he talking about?

3. Due to the thick-headed nature of my four legged companion, the Orange One, I can only assume that “him” refers to me. But where will they take me?

One thing is for sure: they’ll never take me alive. This demands a new string of surprise attacks– to the bunker!

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