recovered surveillance photo taken by Human

CLICK! CLICK! OPEN!

As the cage door opened (which I’m sure I had loosened over the course of the trip), I sprang at the unwitting Human.

pppfffffffffffffFFFFTTTT! HISS! SCRATCH…and finally BITE! My deadly combo stunned Human so much that he dropped the cage altogether, leaving me free to bolt away into the darkness.

I stayed away for hours, taking refuge in the local forest shrub, reeling in victorious celebration. An hour later, I grew hungry and cold. I slipped into a side door that the Orange One miraculously remembered to open, into the in-laws abode for a victory feast, some bubbly, and a much deserved slumber.

As I entered, the humans gathered ’round in apology, but I vehemently declined. On the upside, they filled my bowl with above average blah, and I later knocked over a glass of wine and slurped up my fill of the remains.

Life was sweet as wine, and I began to sleep…